touched

it was such a boring day, but pretty luck one...
It was a cold and sunny morning. I went online to check out the results of my PBL test. I got a H2B... It was not that bad, at least thats what i thought. However, i do think that i can do much better than that. so here i am trying to set myself a goal. I should not be so ambicious now, may be trying to get a H1 at least for the next test?
scott and dougles asked me to join them for the free bbq at the flagstaff gardent this afternoon. i was quite reluctant to go though, but later that i felt that i have been asking them out so often and that they have keep my accompany, for this once i should follow them and be their accompany. well, in the end we only passed by there and did not actually join them. reason was just because the people seem so boring standing there doing nothing at all.
later then dougles and scott decided to go to the library, but i felt that i did not bring any books nor prepared anything so going there is just going to waste my time, so i went to KFC to had wicked wings while they go to the library to meet whoever they want. oh by the way, dougles aim to the library was not to study but to look for someone... so that was another reason that i thought i shouldn't go. i finished my wings and looked at the catalogues while i wait for their return to go lygon for ice-cream. but soon i felt lonely and boring so i called dougles to check where they were. i told him to be quick and go, at that moment he said okay. but later he called, this time i knew that he won't be coming anymore or rather will be another 20 mins or so. i decided to call off the meeting and headed home. i wasted my whole afternoon doing nothing. i came home and talked to my mum. i also watched a few chapters of drama named " a liter of tears".
this movie is really touching. it draws out the strength of a person who suffers from an uncureable disease. it questions the society. it shows how a person could be so weak. i was indeed touched by the movie. this movie is actually adapted from a real person. the photos of this little girl was played at the end of each series. looking at the photos i was again moved by the courage that she had when she faced this world, this society.
there is this sentence that caught my attention: doctors are not god, they are just human who could only distinguish disease. they may seem strong yet they are weak. upon fighting against this deadly sickness, they could not do anything. this sickness is very cruel. it does not damage ur brain cells but your nerve cells. early stage, the person will have difficulty in movement. while later stages the person will be paralyse, cant eat and eventually leads to deathness.
life is short, time passes really fast. live the fullest that we can each day with no regret.
today, i felt emptiness, spending the whole evening having my dinner alone. only manage to cal xin ju at night and went out to have supper. it was so lucky i got a free BMI check on the machine. came home after that and i am infront of my computer now. here i am trying hard to write this entry to note down every little thing, every little thought i have...
p.s. i think my writing skills have deproved a lot need to buck up!
nitess
zk@!